I am an attention seeker

I hate not being noticed. It makes me feel like I don't
exist. I've done a lot of insane things for attention. I spend a great deal
of my time plotting ways to draw more attention to myself. I cut my
hair into an extreme style; only a few people noticed. I am still trying
to figure out ways to get people to notice me. But I really only do it
because I don't have any close relationships outside of my immediate
family. I wish someone would care. I've always wanted a best friend,
someone who I'm close to and who is close to me. I've never had one. I'm too
socially impaired. A good analogy would be this: when you're starving
to death you're willing to eat anything. When you're starving for
someone caring if you live or die, you get desperate for someone to give you
some attention. I know I'm pathetic. I hate myself.